Bile never tasted so good.

It's day three.

The legs are sore. The hands are sore. The backside to put it delicately on the saddle, is sore. The mind too is sore. Anyone would think it a reasonable time to complain about such things. The truth couldn't be further, certainly further than Melbourne.

Two days prior were packed with kilometre after kilometre of punishement, the body pummeled by pushing a single (39:18) gear over the dusty bergs.

This is one of my all time favourite photos.

I stumbled down the stairs, one hand on the balustrade, each downward thud felt in each thigh.

Dan was already halfway through the cooked breakfast that was included with the nights accommodation. He talked me through the days route as I worked my way through runny eggs and fried toast. I can recall none of it. Im sure it entailed much of the same climbing, twisiting and turning, descending only to climb again.

View Larger Map

Yep, that's a map.

Tired? Sore? Call someone who cares. Another huge day on the bike awaited. UpDave was praying for less than 5 punctures today.

'It's straight uphill for 7km to Matlock'. Dan 'the chook whisperer' wasn't lying.

It was straight up from the very foot of the Woods Point pub, and didn't stop till the top.

It wasn't even 7.30am but the glints of sun that split the trees was like a bar heater on my back. I'd stuck with Dan for the first kilometre, and like every other climb let him pedal to the beat of his own drum. I felt my breakfast rise, and got half a mouthful of bile. It tasted horrible, but it couldn't spoil the magic of being on the bike with friends, beautiful surrounds, and not having to think about anything other than getting to Matlock. Dan and I regrouped towards the top, sweating beading down our faces and exposed skin, dust sticking to it forming a natural UV barrier.

Dan and I waited in a log hut at Matlock overlooking the valley below. Dumped the bags, ripped off the helmet and downed as much water as we could. Both of us looking pretty shabby. 'When I rode this with Scooter and Ugly it was snowing' said Dan. Maybe it was the delirium kicking in, but words and even images don't do this ride justice. I imagined being as tired and some, and having to deal with extreme cold rather than heat. Did Scooter really manage to make it all the way up the climb from A1 settlement? Impossible! The perspective I had on this ride now cemented it as the hardest and most gratifying I'd ever done (so far).

Miles from anywhere. The anywhere's where miles from somewhere I'd heard of.

The days ride was constantly undulating dirt roads along the ridge of the ranges, with bizarre perfectly sealed sections of a kilometre in the middle of nowhere a cruel taunt. Not as cruel as the fox deterrent though.

'..and doncha come back here none'

For the velospotters.

I was running 39:18.

BREV FYX chainring up front, White industries in the back and a basic Izumi chain holding it all together. Next time I'll remember to bring lube.

32mm Maxxis rubber, Weinman canti's and Dura Ace throughout. The old reynolds 531 Gazelle is a mack truck compared to the feather-weight Columbus Life/Spirit Problem child with ti fork and carbon wheels - which I'd like to think explained Dan floating up the climbs, or maybe I need to harden up.

Dan and I had got a full head of steam after a few sharper pinch's and had a few minutes up the sleeve from our fellow adventurers, much like the hare it seemed a perfect opportunity to lie on the ground, and let the blood drain back to the head in the shade. It was so peaceful to be still, silent and hear nothing but your own breath and feel your chest rise and fall.

UpDave and Adele greeted us with candy, and according to Dan the hardest part of the day was through - almost. The memory can get a little blurry, it all starts to look and feel the same.

All the climbing was finally rewarded with one of the most exhilarating descents ever. Reefton Spur. I only knew of it through avid motorcyclists, and I could see why it was so popular. This road which essentially goes nowhere is like a black magic carpet with cambered twists and turns. Someone dropped an imaginary flag and Dan and I were tucked low trying to reel in UpDave who had the advantage of gears. The descent seemed to go on forever, there would be a short flat section, then down again at full speed. My cheeks hurt from smiling, my legs hurt from trying to spin at 180rpm while descending. The Yarra Valley to the right, a wall of rock to the left, and wind blasting past my ears. 'That was awesome' I said to Dan. Dan had been in hot pursuit of the Salvodelli award. 'When you snuck ahead, I was using the trees as time checks to gauge the distance I was behind you!'

With Reefton done, McMahons Pub provided a soothing ale and shade from the hot sun. As hot as it was one of the customers who rolled up in the ubiquitous holden ute was wearing ugg boots. None of us could make sense of it, but we'd just ridden 450km on dirt over 3 days. Who was the crazier I'll you let decide.

Warburton. A semi-civilised oasis. UpDave and Adele had met us here two days ago and thankfully their vehicle was still there. 'Want a lift back to town?' Dan and I looked at each other. Call it ESP or the knowing without speaking an old married couple gets after years of marriage, we knew exactly what the other would say. 'Yes please.'

All that remained of the ride was the 80km slog back into the burbs, battling traffic, horns, lights. All the things we'd avoided with ease in the country. We had the legs for it, but neither of us had the patience for it. We ate and drank heartily at the cafe in Warby, loaded all 4 bikes and adventurers and rolled out.

UpDave and Adele dropped us back at the (old) Shifterbikes HQ, and thanks to the mad southerly and some brilliant skitching I made the commute back to the boonies in record time.

What I have learned from this epic experience? Nothing I didn't already know. Nothing and I mean nothing beats riding with good friends.

Thanks for tagging along.

*TC

For the ears - Where in the hell have you been in the last three days?!

Adobe Flash Player not installed or older than 9.0.115!